


Su-purr-natural

by assren



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Abaddon tripped and fell headfirst into the ground, Don't Judge Me, Rowena turns Cas into a Cat, TOO MUCH, and Dean and Crowley still became besties because reasons, and The Mark never happened, he just wants to be loved, sorry not sorry about the title, thats how she died, thats what Crowley thinks at least, this is a birthday gift / jokey fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-14
Updated: 2015-10-14
Packaged: 2018-04-26 01:55:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,050
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4985542
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/assren/pseuds/assren
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Rowena turns Cas into a cat, TFW + Crowley will have to either learn how to live with it or capture her and force her to turn him back.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Su-purr-natural

**Author's Note:**

  * For [castiel_lightwood](https://archiveofourown.org/users/castiel_lightwood/gifts).



> I'm only writing happy things because its Amy's birthday, don't get used to it.

This was a weirdly normal day in the bunker for Dean Winchester. And not _Winchester_ normal, _normal_ normal. Which meant that something was about to happen. The Winchesters didn't have _normal_ normal days, they had to stop apocalypses or fight some messed up ancient evil.

Dean was happy however, worried sure, but happy. He hadn't seem Sammy just reading a book in a while, not a fiction book at least, for the first time in years Sammy wasn't reading something for research. He was reading a book recreationally.

_'I can get used to this,'_ Dean thought. _'No big bad evil. No ancient bullshit. Just me, Sammy and ...'_ Dean stopped and looked around the bunker, he just saw Sammy, reading his Merlin Potter or whatever book.  _'Where the hell is Cas?'_

Then, the Winchester normal started. Dean heard an annoyingly familiar voice behind him.

'Hello, boys,' it said.

Dean quickly turned around, drawing his gun and pointing it at the demon's head. 'What do you want?' He growled

'Hey,' Sam said without moving from his spot or taking his eyes off his book.

'Well, at least Moose has manners,' Crowley stepped foward and put his hand in his coat, grabbing something.

Dean uncocked his gun with his thumb, 'Don't.'

'Chill out, Squirell. It's just a gift,' Crowley pulled a cat out of his coat. A black and white cat, that looked as confused as Dean.

'What-' Dean started

'It's your angel boyfriend, Squirrel,' Crowley interrupted him. 'My mother was ... kind enough to turn him into a cat.'

Sam put down his book and started to listen to the conversation.

'Cas? This - this cat is Cas?' Dean was pointing at the feline and nervously smiling. He didn't know what else to do, Crowley was shitting right? He had to be.

'Yes,' Crowley shrugged. 'You see, Cats-tiel there was helping me find my _dear_   Mother. I assume he didn't tell you anything because you'd get jealous.'

The Cat jumped on the table Sam was sitting next to. He started to pet the cat. Both of them watching the conversation between the King of Hell and the Hero of Heaven.

'How?' Dean asked, angrily.

'My mother is a witch, dumbass,' Crowley snarled. 'How do you think it happened? She did some of her weird spells and poof.' He raised his closed hands and opened them, in an arc motion, 'your favorite angel became a ball of fur.'

Dean let out a sigh and looked at the cat, "Catstiel" glared back at him, with deep blue eyes much like his human version.

'Personally, I think she could have choosen a better animal, Castiel is a lot of things but I wouldn't call him a pussy,' Crowley shrugged and smirked, proud of himself. Catstiel hissed and Sam quietly chuckled.

Dean groaned, 'just shut up.'

Crowley pointed at Sam, 'Moose liked it.' He sounded offended.

'Can you fix him?' Dean asked doing his best to ignore what the King of Hell just said, and the tone he used.

'I'm not a witch, Squirrel. I have no idea of what spell _dear_  Mother used.'

Sam put his book on the table and got up after scratching Cas' ear. 'So we go after her,' he said.

Cas got up and meowed, nodding.

Dean sighed, 'thats either Cas or a really smart cat.'

'Anyway, I'll put my demons to search for Mother. I'll get back here when I know where she is,' and with that Crowley disappeared after snapping his fingers.

'Now what?' Dean asked.

Sam shrugged, 'we take care of your cat boyfriend.'

'Go to hell.' Dean put walked over to Sam and put his gun on the table. He then sat down and stared at Cas.

Cas meowed again. Staring at Dean's eyes.

'I don't even like cats...' he said.

Cas knocked Dean's gun off the table with his paw without taking his eyes off him.

'Oh, fuck you.'

Sam laughed and petted Cas again. The cat/angel purred satisfied, still glaring at Dean.

* * *

 

'How's the search for the Witch going?' Crowley asked, suddenly appearing in front of some of his subjects inside his throne room.

The demons around him got confused. 'The - the search for the Witch, Sir?' One of them asked.

Crowley sighed, 'yes, the search for the Witch.'

The demons looked at each other, one of them, with long dark curly hair, stepped foward. 'But, My King, we already found her. You - your highness went after her with the fallen angel Castiel, remember?'

Crowley sighed again and pointed at one of the lesser demons, then at a wine bottle on a table, the demon quickly went to grab wine for his king. 'Yes, I do remember. I haven't lost my memory yet, sadly.' The demon came back with a glass of wine, Crowley took the wine and sat down at his throne taking a sip. 'My turn to ask you questions, Lestrange.'

The demons behind Lestrange took a step back and she gulped.

'Did I come back with the Witch as my prisoner?' He calmly asked.

'No, Sir, but-'

'Do not interrupt me,' he took another sip of wine. 'Now, did I send a someone here with the Witch as captive?'

'No, Sir.' Lestrange seemed nervous. _'Good,'_ Crowley thought.

He took yet another sip of wine. 'So, if I didn't bring her myself, and I didn't send anyone with her here, that means that the Witch...?' He raised an eyebrow.

'Escaped?' She cautiously answered.

'Oh, she can think,' He sarcastically clapped. Crowley's expression darkened 'yes, she escaped, so start the searching for her again. Quickly.'

'Right away, My King,' the demons behind her dissapeared after the King finished.

'And, Lestrange?' He said right as she was about to teleport too.

An empty glass of wine flew by Lestrange, almost hitting her pale face. 'Yes, Sir?' She did her best to ignore it.'

'Be kind enough to bring me another glass.'

* * *

Sam entered the Bunker with grocery bags and a pizza. Dean was nowhere to be seen, _'he must be taking care of Cas,_ ' He thought.

He went to the kitchen and put the bags and the pizza on the counter.

'Hey, Dean? I bought us some food after I bought the things for Cas. I also got us pizza,' he yelled. Sam was storing the groceries in the kitchen cupboard as he spoke.

After finishing it, Sam picked up a plate and knife and started to cut pizza for himself. 'Dean, you want a slice?' He yelled.

No answer.

'Dean?' He yelled again, worried. It could be nothing, Dean could be sleeping, but _when_ was it nothing with them?

No answer again. Sam grabbed the knife he was using and went upstairs to look for his brother.

He carefully opened Dean's bedroom door and saw Dean sitting on his bed, with a finger on his lips and Cas on his legs. 'He's sleeping,' He whispered with a small smile.

'Don't worry me like that,' Sam whispered back.

'I'm sorry, ok? He is sleeping on me so I couldn't get up or yell back.'

'It's Cas, Dean, he wouldn't mind.'

'It's Cas, Sammy, he just got turned into a cat and he is tired,' he sounded awfully defensive. 'I can't wake the dude up!'

Sam sighed, 'fine, do you want pizza or not?'

'Will you bring it to me?'

'Yes, Dean, I will.'

'I do want it then,' He smiled. 'Thank you.'

'Alright,' Sam closed the ajar door. 'I'll let you keep cuddling your boyfriend then.'

'Shut up!' Again, he sounded defensive, louder this time.

Sam laughed, _'now he yells,'_ He thought.

When going down the stairs, Sam overheard a sleepy meow and Dean apologising. Sam smiled.

* * *

Dean woke up abruptly with something small jumping on his chest. He quickly grabbed the gun below his pillow and rolled out of bed, turning the lights on with one hand with the other pointing the gun to his bed.

There was a cat on his bed, a confused looking cat with a dead mouse in his mouth. Dean lowered the gun, 'Cas,' he pointed at the mouse in Cas' mouth, 'why?'

Cas dropped the mouse on Dean's bed and meowed. Dean breathed in and out trying to calm down. _'I'm fine,'_ he thought. Cas knocked the dead mouse around Dean's bed, playing with the corpse. Dean screamed in frustation, 'CAS! YOU SON OF A BITCH!'

Sam came in the room sprinting, gun on hand. 'Dean, you ok? Whats happening? Why are you yelling?' Sam sounded confused and scared.

'THAT MOTHERFUCKER IS PLAYING WITH A DEAD MOUSE ON MY BED,' he pointed at Cas.

Sam lowered his gun and stared Dean with a disapproving look, 'dude, he's a cat.'

'HE'S CAS AND HE'S GOING TO DIE TODAY!' Sam grabbed Dean when he was advancing towards Cas.

The cat kept playing with the corpse on his bed.

'LET ME GO! HE'S MAKING A MESS!' Dean yelled.

'Don't kill Cas. Calm down, we can clean your bed later.' Sam let Dean go.

'Alright, I'm fine.'

Dean heard a familiar voice behind him. 'Hello, bo - why the fuck is Castiel playing with a dead rat in your bed? That is disgusting!' Crowley sounded personally offended.

'SEE, THE KING OF HELL AGREES WITH ME,' he pointed at Crowley.

'Whatever, Dean!' Sam snarled back.

Crowley was still staring at Cas with a disgusted face. Dean snapped his fingers in front of him.

'What - oh, yeah, I came here for a reason.' He turned to Dean, 'sorry, he's awfully hypnotizing.' He shrugged, 'So, Mother, I captured her already. Apparently sending a whole squad of demons that you don't care about is more effective than going by yourself.'

'Does that means you care about Cas?' Sam asked with a smirk.

'No one talked to you, Moose.' Crowley sounded defensive, 'Now, shall we?' He extended his hand to the Winchesters.

They took his hand and he snapped his fingers. They appeared at Crowley's dungeon. Rowena was tied to a chair and some demons guarded the place.

'You have a freking dungeon?' Dean asked.

'What? You think you two are the only ones allowed to have one?' He sarcastically answered.

'Oh, the Winchesters, lovely.' Rowena had a tone of disgust.

'How do we fix the Angel, you son of a witch?' Dean angrilly asked.

'Fix the Angel? What did I do to him?' She asked in a innocent tone.

'You turned him into a cat? Remember that?' Sam stepped foward to look at the Witch's face.

Rowena laughed, 'I turned him into a cat? Do you get your idea of what magic is on a bloody children's book?' She snarled.

Dean looked at Crowley confused, then back at Rowena. 'What did you do to him then?'

'I teleported him to a farm somewhere, if you found a cat in his place its because he went throught the portal somehow.'

'Well, that explains why I couldn't find anything about turning people into cats,' Crowley shrugged.

'Wait, did you capture me because you, the King of Hell, wanted to save an angel? Oh, you really are losing yo-' Crowley snapped his fingers and Rowena was gagged.

'Take her to the torture room, Rudolph.' One of the guard demons came and took a furious Rowena to another room.

'You have a torture room _and_ a dungeon?' Dean asked.

'You have a demon named "Rudolph"?' Sam asked.

'I'm the King of Hell, I have what I want. Now, let me just go look for your angel while you two deal with that cat.' Crowley snapped his fingers and the Winchesters were back on Dean's room. The cat was still playing with the corpse on Dean's bed, but he had decapitated it.

'THAT'S IT!' Dean yelled.

* * *

 

The Winchesters had just finished cleaning Dean's bed whe Crowley teleported in with Castiel.

'He was at a beefarm, taking care of bees,' Crowley sighed.

'Hello, Sam. Hello, De-' Dean ran towards Cas and hugged him.

'CAS, I'M SO GLAD YOU'RE NOT A CAT ROLLING DEAD ANIMALS ON MY BED!' He yelled.

'Thank you? Me too...?' Cas answered. 'Wait, you have a cat?'

'No,' Dean answered.

'Yes,' Sam answered.

'I like cats,' Cas said. 'What's his name?'

'Catstiel,' Crowley mocked.

'...I don't understand,' The Angel was confused.

'Honestly, don't ask,' Sam hugged Cas, 'we missed you, Bud.'


End file.
